0 I am but a child

Many a times the most precious gifts come in "packages" we weren't expecting. We always want more...no matter how much we have. And there’s nothing wrong with having more, as long as you don’t harm others in your pursuit.

But how about appreciating the silly little gifts life has given us?

Call me a hoarder if you want, I have a big plastic box filled with the silliest things.

All gotten from people with huge loving hearts...young and old.

I got engaged, ladies and gentlemen. And of course I added the ring to the collection. It is the most beautiful ring someone has ever given to me. I mean, really, you should see the stone in it...it's simply breathtaking...

Words are not enough to tell you...I'm one of the most blessed women of the earth!

(p.s the stone blinks with a red light when you bend your finger. Sorry I couldn't catch that on camera). Don't be jealous ladies...don’t be jealous!

Hahaha, FINE! it's just a ring I got from my niece and nephew the other day. And my heart really smiles every time I remember the excitement in their voices when asking me to guess what my gift was.

Nope, it wasn't my birthday, it wasn't any special occasion, i just got home from work...tired as ever and I got a pink plastic ring with a flashing red light... JUST BECAUSE...

And this is not the first time... I have all the silliest gifts from my babies;

·         a handmade get well soon card from Nhomies,

·          a drawing of a Sunday school (and also an I love you written on the whiteboard in my room) by Giliani,

·         Genesis' name handwritten by himself with colorful pencils and also a person he drew on a big sheet and

·         "money" from Nheiyo (don't tell anybody it's nothing but two mud covered stones).

I also have handwritten letters from the little bro, asking me to come sleep in his room...from waaaayy back...complete with a drawing of our family and his 'signature' on the bottom.

I have empty candy wraps...which were supposed to symbolize a beautiful picture of me, I have leaves, a 'curious George' bandage ...you name the silly gift and I probably have it (and love it).

Perhaps you laughed, or maybe this reminds you of silly gifts you might have gotten as well.

One thing is true...if we could only see the world through a child's eyes again...we'd see that living shouldn't necessarily be as complicated as we make it sometimes.

Yes, we grownups have responsibilities a child doesn't even dream of. We don't have time for silly things you might say. Or, that it's all a waste of time and energy.

On the other hand, take life too serious and you might realize right at the end of your days that you haven't enjoyed the drops of happiness life has served you in the silly. So why don't we loosen up a little? Have a little fun, enjoy the silly (sometimes even nonsensical) things in life.

There's so much we can learn from life if we'd see the world through a child's eyes, thou (of course) with the knowledge we have today.

·    Be Creative!  Children are mega creative. They can create a whole world while playing...merely in their little heads. To the childrens'creativity, there is no boundaries, no impossibilities. They believe just anything is possible...an in the end, who says it isn't so.

·    Have Fun! I've played an unknown board game with my nephew of three the other day. Only (and I mean only) using stones. No rules, no board, no nothing...even the dice was a stone. And we had FUN. Sit down and watch children at play sometime...it is a moment of supreme joy. The child within wants to play a little...let it out!

·    Love HUGE! A child's love is the most beautiful and pure kind of love out there. Even when you get mad at them this minute...and the next thing you know, you get one of the cutest handwritten apologies or a simple hug that melts your anger away.

·    Over think?? NAAAHH!!; Children believe in the impossible, they don't attach any boundaries to their dreams, and they are willing to travel wherever their imagination wants to take them.

·    Playtime!! Do you remember how mad you could get when you were in the middle of a fun game and your parents called you?  (AAARGH MOM..Not now). What if I tell you, you can get playful as much as you want now? Yup...LIFE, LAUGH...ENJOY

You know? Age doesn't really define how old we truly are... And I'm not talking about the physical of course. But WE decide the ultimate age of our souls!!!

Our attitude, our approach to life, our thoughts, our heart and spirits...such things determine much more than our age. They determine what we do and don't achieve. They determine whether we dare to take risks or not. They determine the way we approach relationships and even the way we perceive ourselves.

Age is just a number, if somewhere in your heart you're holding on to that silly little child inside.

The child that gets a giggling attack for the most unexplained reasons. The child that can invent the most delicious cakes with mud, that child that sees the world through a glass of immeasurable possibilities. The child that is willing to take on any adventure at all. The child that dreams... and believes. Yes believes that

·         “superheroes” exist in real life (aha, they do. They just don’t wear super suits. My mom for instance is an awesome one. And I know a few more),

·         love can conquer,

·         there is still good in the world (starting in YOUR heart),

·         you can be anything you set their minds to be (yup...ANYTHING) and...

·         anything is possible.

Hold on...Hold on tight to that playful, beautiful, awesome child within.

I'm not asking you to go through your everyday activities leaping like a little child, I’m just asking you to not lose contact with the little child in you.

The plea is to believe immeasurably, to dream big, to pursue without getting tired, to love more, to do without over thinking...to live your life fully

It's one of the most rejuvenating experiences ever; to get in touch with that inner child every now and then. C'mon...there's nothing shameful about that! You have nothing to lose...

You know, Just saying...

0 Ia(m)e

Should you ever come to a crossroad, where external factors are trying to knock so hard against your identity, to the point where your life hath taken a 360 degree turn and you find yourself standing again at square one; stand still...

Who are you really?

What do you want in life?

What is your goal?

What drives you?

How do you plan to excel in life?

External factors are prone to contribute onto forming the humanbeing.

Society sets standards to which we choose to keep ourselves on a daily basis. Your family has certain believes, rules and customs. Your friends have (sometimes without previous agreements) a certain pattern of behavior. "Religion" or whatever spiritual conviction you choose...has rules, regulations, laws and standards. Work/school sets their own behavioral- (& dress) code.
Go on, fill in the names of what/whom else has been (trying to) form you in such a way...

I don't exactly oppose any of the above mentioned. But face it, sometimes they can get pretty irrational; to the point where you loose sight of who you are.
And sometimes people will come to "like" you, solely based on whether or not you keep yourself to their standards. So, in a certain fear of not being "disliked", we sometimes keep ourselves to every single expectation of the person/place we're dealing with.
*If you know your family believes a certain behavior is horrible for people of your color, social status or origin, you choose not to behave like that...JUST because that's what you've been taught...and you don't want to dishonor your family of course.
*Your friend utterly detests it when you speak in a certain tone of voice, so you (try to) control yourself around him/her...even thou you feel perfectly comfortable speaking in THAT particular tone.
*Religion tells you not to do something, and you simply restrain from doing it without really being able to explain the reason why you don't.
* Society tells you to dress in a certain way, so even thou you feel better dressed as an Apache indian, you resolve to wear what society requires you to, to fit in.

Wait, I'm not promoting brutality or liberalism and much less lawbreaking. I'm just trying to tell you to stand still in the midst of it all. Know who YOU really are. And be true to you... Even when merging into the different roles you have in society, don't ever loose YOURSELF from sight.

I...I am Sy. I am (still) a believer. I am multi-talented. I am a strong woman. I am not perfect and neither do I claim to be.I am (sometimes) very outspoken and sarcastic. I paint my nails in extravagant and crazy colors inspite of my serious job. I can be very introverted and secretive. I am a survivor. I am a lover. I am a friend. I spend a lot of time thinking. I am a fighter. I am (sometimes) a shameless flirt. I am loyal, I am a big dreamer, I can act crazy sometimes and enjoy it, I can be difficult, I do laugh about my own stupidity sometimes, I make mistakes...I sometimes avoid facing my problems. I am Sy...

And in the end I am nothing but me, and I hope you love me for me. Not for any possessions i might/might not have. Not for any of my physical traits. Not for what I did, do or don't. Not for keeping up to the rules. Not for obeying the laws and regulations. Not for living up to the social/behavioral/religious standards or for lacking to do so.
And much less for the image of me you've created in your mind. But love me, accept me and appreciate me for me.
And so, this is me; with all my flaws, mistakes, shortcomings, abilities, strongholds and all... And I hope you'll learn to love me for me.

Who are you really?
What is it, that makes you you?
Stop sacrificing who you are...
Discover yourself, love yourself and always be true to yourself! My piece of advice...

0 Agent Sy...reporting!!

So, blog has been in a state of weird comma for the past month. I owe it to myself thou. Vacation, busy schedules, procrastination... The whole package!

I tell you, there's been millions of blog-worthy topics...hope I get the time to share it all bit by bit these coming days. If not, I'll mention them someday. You can be pretty sure of that...I've got that kind of a random mind. :p (I think my friends can tell you)

Well, vacation...??? (Sy puts a wide grin)
Vacation was simply "aaaaaahmazin'" !!! It was relaxing, enjoyable, unforgettable 'n plain cool. I enjoyed the views, the stay, the people, the food, the warmth, the cocktails, the free-vacational spirit...I've enjoyed it all! Mind, heart, body and spirit came back satisfied.
Celebrated my 27th b-day there and it was one of the very best b-days EVER.
Pointing out every single second of my two weeks vacation would be waaaaaaayy too much. So I spare you the (not so juicy) details. LoL
One thing's certain, the Dominican Republic knows how to make me gain weight each and every time I visit. But regardless of THAT bogus point...I might be planning a visit soon again. Maybe....just maybe!
But,sadly enough I've been back to reality for two weeks now. And some parts of reality suck!

One thing I've been pondering about...
It's amazing how one single action can sometimes change our whole perception of someone...
Panic not, maybe my perception of you moved up, instead of down! But some people...argh anyways, I'll figure my way out!

Turning the page , next week I'm starting my Master degree... LAW! I have to admit thou; with mixed feelings. Some part of me really wants this new adventure, new knowledge, new people, new achievement.
But then the other part's so unsure if THIS is what I really want... Packed schedules, study study study, stress, less blogging time and minus zero social life (compared to my already antisocial state).
(Sigh)....THOUGH ONE!!!

On yet another note, as you could deduct from the vacation paragraph...I gained weight on my vacay.
Six whole depressing kilos came back home to momma!!! Told everyone the word "diet" wasn't known where I went... I mean, are you crazy?? Dieting on an all inclusive vacay's absolutely insane! A vacay is a vacay... So I left whatever belongs home right here...at home!
But as soon as I came back I picked it back up, and as for last tuesday when I weighed in, I've lost four of the six. So, "yeay" for still winning the battle against weight gain! This tuesday's weigh in again, we'll see what victory brings us this time!

Anyways dudes and dudettes...I need to go catch a snooze now really... Tomorrow (later on) promises to be a long day!
Every time I can I'll be catching up on the blogging. And if there is a particular topic you want to see me blog about just lemme know...
We'll see what I can do about that. :p
Signing out and laying down the duties for the night...
Yours always,
Sy

Sent from my BlackBerry® device from Digicel

0 It's just a pain in the butt!

Some things in this world just makes you go "huh?" 

There’s this woman I know, who’s been losing weight too; so far she’s lost 31 pounds.

Excellent achievement!

She looks great and I can imagine... it feels damn awesome too.

The only thing is, she’s been experiencing a terrible pain in her butt every time she sits for a long time.
Every time she gets up to go do anything, I hear “aaaaaaaiiiii CHANCHAN!!” (ouchhhhh my BUT!!).
The thing has come to the point where I think she isn’t really aware she says it anymore. (YUP, she said it in a couple of embarrassing situations already). Before she lost any weight, she never before experienced this pain.

Question is; what in the world is wrong with her butt? Is it that, after you lose years of accumulated padding around your butt, your tailbone starts letting the world know it exists? I mean, logically thinking...that could be it. Maybe the tailbone was hidden all the time behind a housing of extras and now feels so free that it has chosen to make its presence known in quite a harsh way.

But, I searched it up (duh!). And it seems to be that this woman's not the only one with this problem. Many women (and some men) worldwide seem to be living through this pain every day. Some of them went through surgery to remove their tailbone and some others use doughnut shaped pillows or tailbone pillows to relieve the pain. The internet is full of information about this uncommon phenomenon; from personal experiences, to doctors’ recommendations. It appears to be that pain in the tailbone should heal by itself with time. And it seems that permanent tailbone pain is very hard to explain. A doctor said the pain can be minimized depending on the way you sit. Leaning backward causes more pressure on the tailbone and thus more pain. Doctors too recommend a doughnut pillow, for comfort and relief. More than forums and some small, very medical articles I haven’t found much explanation for the tailbone pain after this woman’s weight loss. But I’ve found some pretty interesting facts about the tailbone itself.

Here are just 5, for your enjoyment...

·         The proper name of the tailbone is the “coccyx”, derived from the Greek word for cuckoo. Not because of the tailbone’s function, but because it looks like a cuckoo’s beak;

·         The tailbone isn’t really (completely) a bone. It is rather an appendage of skin and fat and occasionally some bone. (Well, that could explain the link between losing weight (fat) and tailbone pain). Dr John Loeser M.D. calls it a disorganized hunk of tissue on the bottom of the butt;

·         Women have (a little) more protection in the tailbone area than men. The female pelvis protects the tailbone somewhat. Plus, women have more fat on their buttocks, which protects the tailbone, says Dr. Haldeman.;

·         Even thou injury to the tailbone happens rarely (because you’d most likely land on your buttocks rather than on your tailbone), this type of injury is called “coccydynia”. Which just means “pain in the tailbone”;

·         Some people still discuss whether the tailbone is a remaining of a tail that lost its function during evolution.

So, no answer for this woman’s literal pain in the butt, yet still an inch smarter...

0 The lost massa report

In one of my first blog posts I stated about my weight loss journey. And yes, I’m still working on it.

Sometimes the going is very easy and the motivation is sky high. But at other times not even the most motivational article online won’t do the trick. Nope, not even the colleague who tells you that you’ll gain 11 pounds if you eat THAT.

I’ve learned thou, through trial and error, that it takes a good control of that switch in the mind that makes you eat excessively, unhealthy or just wrong.
I am by nature a stress-eater; meaning that I’m used to suppress stress by eating. (Read: indulging my senses; sometimes to in an uncontrollable manner). And not to mention my harsh PMS knock downs. Stressed states and PMS, for me, normally goes paired with chocolate, chips (and dips), sweets, ice cream and junk food. 
So, in the battle for a new lifestyle, between my overindulgent self and my (now) more self conscious self, I had to find another way to deal.
And I guess you’d expect me to say that I’ve found the formula, right? Well, yes...and no!
After months of travelling the weight loss lane I have one conclusion. There is actually no super formula to the cravings for something totally satisfying when you’re wired with stress or having PMS.
The cravings will come!
And the way to deal is to have control on the mental switch that says “GO AHEAD,...satiate your wanting!!!”  and the other switch that deliberately tells you “No,...not now!”.
In other words, it’s all in the mind!!

I still get cravings. (MAYOR CRAVINGS). And I’ve managed to strengthen my mental switch quite well and can (most of the times) silent the need to gratify. Besides, I have found healthier ways to pace down the need for snacking (to mention an example. Peanuts (especially almonds), raisins or simply a good fruit juice often does it for me.
Everyone should experiment with the healthy choices and find their favorites.
At other times I DO succumb to my cravings for a good, juicy and fat burger for example; or simply a creamy chocolate bar. Of course, if I need to make this my new lifestyle in order to lose and maintain a healthy weight, I won’t be able to do a lifetime without sir!!! So I occasionally do give in... but the key is, not to overdo.

So far, I’ve lost 46 pounds (20,8 kgs) and I’ve lost track of the overall centimeters lost. Losing the extra weight feels absolutely great. You feel more comfortable in your skin, gorgeous and super self-confident.
People will soon start noticing and giving you compliments on the new you. (Even thou you have to watch out not to let those compliments boost you into allowing yourself to eat more than you should).
But the best part of it all is when YOU start noticing all the differences... It’s an achievement YOU made. And that’s such an awesome feeling! You can be sooooo proud of yourself for it...

I still have more losing to do. I’m aiming for another 44 ponds (20kgs), but most people told that much is not necessary. So we’ll see what it’ll be!  
My dietician told me I’ve reached my so called “stubborn fat”. And well ironically my friends sometimes tell me I can be quite stubborn myself. So, let’s see who wins this stubbornness battle...

Will occasionally keep you posted on the warfare updates =)