0 The Victory

Promise made is a debt unpaid.  ~Robert Service

The day before yesterday, when I was drowning in my anguish about the exam, I made a promise; that I will inform you in due time about the results.
By now, most of my actual followers know the result already... HA-HA you guys couldn’t handle to just wait huh? Impatient!!!

But hey, it’s totally understandable. Having to wait is a virtue only a few have mastered...lol

Most of you know how much I “loved” working on this thesis. And most of you know how much I’ve been through to make it this far. Including totally sleepless nights and completely re-writing the damn thing. In an earlier post (dated March 19 2011) I expressed myself for the first time on this blog about the frustration of making a thesis. But surely I finished the post saying (and I quote) :

“Just a couple of months left to fight this “thesis virus” and by June 2011 I’ll be stronger, wiser, better & GRADUATED.”

The moment I stepped in the meeting room where I had to defend my thesis, I had nothing else in mind but this.

Don’t ask how the conversation went. I can still remember how I was shaking, thinking hard, hoping, fighting and trying to look strong...ALL AT THE SAME TIME. And I can’t recall much, the minutes went by fast, the questions were unexpected and the faces of the 4 people sitting at that table were (at that moment) blank...no approval and or disapproval was to be read on their faces. My heart was beating in my throat, my hands were shaking...and it almost felt like crying from pure nervousness.

And it did go though my head...”What if I didn’t make it?” But the need to finish was much stronger, and continuously it hushed that voice that wanted to doubt.

My mom was the person who has strengthened me the most. She didn’t do much neither did she say much. But the whole morning, only with her attitude and her being, she was mega supportive and calming.
And at the moment I left the only thing she said, “In the name of God, my child”. That was enough to boost me for the last mile...

The moment was unforgettable! And as nervous as I could have been, I’m glad I went through it. All of it has contributed to make me indeed stronger, wiser, better and yes...also GRADUATED.
And I wouldn’t trade the feeling for a dime...

Seems as thou I faced another barrier, I fought a giant...and I came out victorious. Next monster...HERE I COME!!!

As I said in my previous post...THIS WAS IT! And indeed...it marked the reaping of 6 long years of hard work, tears, sweat and perseverance. But I tell you, the fruit sure is sweet!

2 It felt like it, it looked like it, but it just wasn't it

THESIS: To Hate Every Single Inch, Seriously!

I have been working on my thesis lately; reason why I couldn’t really blog as much as I wish I could.

The abbreviation above definitely resembles my thoughts about this whole thesis thing. Graduation has never before been such a pain. And I’m hating it. I totally detest the idea of making a thesis. I mean, why a thesis? Who invented thesis? Couldn’t that person have a better idea? Like, wasn’t there another form of examination? (Sigh)

And on top of it, you provide me with someone who’s supposed to support & guide me through the process that clearly has NO idea what she’s doing. Lucky me! Or, she does not want me to graduate (LOL).  But hey...I see no logical reason why she’d want to do such a thing. So,…we discard the latter!

Anyway, I’ve written something for the past months that felt like a thesis. I wasn’t really comfortable with it, I must say. But neither was I getting any feedback or indication that what I have been writing was just not exactly the assignment.

Last Wednesday I handed in what should have been one of the last concepts of it. And, decided right before clicking the send button that I just HAD to make some astronomical changes.

First reaction I’ve gotten? “Sy…you have NO time!!” But I believe such a thing just doesn’t exist when the ultimate goal is just as important to a person as graduation is to me. I’m not comfortable with what I previously worked on and I’m going to make the necessary changes. PERIOD!

Thus, Sy has been working on it the whole weekend (since Thursday night). ‘Cause Monday morning I’m mailing her a totally re-written, graduation material thesis. YES SIR!

You are just not going to tell me it’s impossible and that there’s no time. I’ll work my butt off and prove you wrong.

Just a couple of months left to fight this “thesis virus”. And by June 2011 I’ll be stronger, wiser, better &

GRADUATED.